Pakistan Cricket Team

Shoaib Ahktar has Genital Warts says PCB official: TRUE STORY.

When it was reported that Shoaib Ahktar had a skin condition on his groin; I thought about writing a whole post about him having some STD.

I was going to write about oozing puss, scabby skin, and really freak you out.

But then I thought, no, that is TOO easy.

Way TOO easy.

Instead I wrote about Shoaib wearing Geoff Lawson’s skin as a coat.

Now the Pakistani’s are dropping Shoaib Ahktar because he has Genital Warts.

I don’t want to alert any Australians, but Shane Watson injured his groin in the series against Pakistan.

Now never having gay sex, I don’t know exactly how the logistics work, but it seems unlikely they would have been “cock to cock”, doesn’t it

However they could have accidently “crossed swords” if they were double-teaming a young lady.

Although I do prefer to think of them as a couple.

You might think that genital warts is the most embarrassing sexual injury that an administracrat can put in a press release it isn’t.

They could have said:
Shoaib is out because they gerbil cannot be removed.
Shoaib is out because his penis is split from obsessive-compulsive masturbation.
Shoaib is out because he has broken a rib trying to pleasure himself orally.

It is a wonderful day to be a blogger.

Shoaib has a problem

I was reading BBC and came across this;

“Shoaib Akhtar has pulled out of Pakistan’s training camp ahead of June’s World Twenty20 tournament in England because of a skin problem.”

From then on in all I could imagine was Shoaib wearing Geoff Lawson’s skin as an overcoat.

Was I the only one?

Australia warm up for the world t20 thingy with a crushing loss

It was a great effort too.

Bowled out for 108.

That is the way you ready yourself for an international tournment.

It’s called tapering.

The news gets better, well for some it does.

Guess who injured himself?

Go on, guess.

Not hard is it, Golden Jelly bean Shane Watson managed to injur himself during his 14 ball innings.

That is a fair effort.

He did his groin: queue the laughter.

The real shame was that he was the only batsman who turned up for Australia.

Talking of people turning up for the game, Brett Lee did.

Apparently he isn’t an Air-Hostess, he still plays cricket.

And he bowled fast, and didn’t get injured, take that Watson.

Pakistan rode on the back of Umar Gul (with a tasty 4/8) and the world’s hottest man Kamran Akmal.

Hard to know whether a one off 2020 game in a desert will help Pakistan in England or not, but at least they didn’t embarrass themselves.

The way Australia played you would have thought the Kolkata Knight Riders had loaned back their coach.

Australia WIN

They beat Pakistan.


Douggie Bollinger gets wickets.

Michael Clarke and Shane Watson share huge partnership.

Saeed Ajmal is still hard to play.

But he can’t take a wicket.

That is all I spose.

Don’t bullshit a bullshitter

Younis Khan and Michael Clarke have given completely unbiased comments to the press over Saeed Ajmal ’s doosra.

Michael Clarke has said,

“Watto certainly didn’t go to the umpires and say a word, none of our players have approached the umpires and spoken about it…I think Watto was pretty upset with the shot he played and getting out”

Now watch this Video that Ducking Beamers alerted me to.

Clarke is absolutely correct, Watson never told the umpire, he did yell to Roy about it, who was standing next to the umpire, and then he told Ajmal all about it, while he was within a metre of the umpire.

So no, Pup, he didn’t tell the umpire, but he did ensure that the umpire heard on at least two occasions in this footage alone.

Not to be out propaganded, Younis Khan has this to say,

“This is always happening with India and Pakistan and Australia…. Why do we create all the time controversies? Why? It’s a fair game, you know.

You’re talking about the doosra, Why (shouldn’t) he (Ajmal) bowl doosra? Because this is an art and especially Pakistanis and Indians they have the art, so why (should it) not be allowed?”

All fair points you might say, except:

Cricket Next has written that Saeed Ajmal has been called before.

This is not some massive conspiracy from Ricky Ponting and James Sutherland. Watson had a strop, and the officiating panel who put Ajmal up for chucking are Umpires BF Bowden (New Zealand) and Nadeem Ghauri (Pakistan), TV umpire Asad Rauf (Pakistan) Match referee JJ Crowe (New Zealand)Reserve umpire Zameer Haider (Pakistan).

And, before this, the last 3 people Australia had anything to do with being called for chucking were A Bird (AUS), J Gunn (ENG) and J Botha (SA).

Australia continue to spin, but Pakistan continues to do it better.

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