Bring back Greg Matthews

December 21, 2021

I could come up with many reasons why Greg Matthews, the man I spent my youth baiting at the G, should come back to the Australian team.

It could be his relationship with cricket with balls’ smooth eddie cowan, when Eddie played with Greg, not the other way around, at Sydney University.

It could be that according to wikipedia Matthews took Phil Jaques’ wicket when he played Sunderland not that long ago.

Or it could be the fact I had a beer with him (in as much as anyone can have a beer with Matthews) today.

The real reason is that if Australia are going to play like this, they might as well do it with proper entertaining cricketers.

During my youth I despised Matthews, but he was the most entertaining player I ever saw.

He was not just a cricketer, but a vaudeville act out on the ground. He seemed to be involved with several conversations at one time, a few of those with himself.

If he didn’t get wickets, or even worse, he did, it really didn’t matter to us because we just loved the way he played the game.

Sure, you could say that he might be better than Doherty and Hauritz, he might even be better than a genetically spliced version of Xavier Hauritz, but that means nothing.

Australia aren’t that good, and Matthews isn’t going to make this team great, but he will make them watchable.

For many reasons.

There is the thrill of the come back, he could be cricket’s very own Kenny Powers.

Then there is the brilliant crazy nature of the man, the spinning comedian.

And then there is the simple thing that people would be interested in Australian spin again.

Australian spin is in such a boring state that I don’t even write about it anymore, writing about it causes sudden blackouts.

Matthews would change that.

He’d get people talking about it, without making the team any worse.

And if he doesn’t want to come back, why not pick Tiger Bill O’Reilly, you could get Warnie to operate him like a puppeteer, Channel 9 could make a series out of it, Weekend at Tiger’s.

People like Puppets.