Reasons why nathan hauritz shouldn’t play for australia

December 21, 2021

He has clearly gone over as an embedded journalist.

Off spin is an art; it is not an extra curricula activity.

To be a finger spinner in this modern world you need any, or all, of the following: a doosra, a bent arm, a massive chin, the ability to grow facial hair at an alarming rate, height of over 6’6, be wristy.

Australia doesn’t really like off spinners.

Shane Warne could use him as floss.

He still gets out bowled by Greg Matthews.

The Ashes is not open mic night.

There is still time to get Tim May a shirt that fits him.

Less than 25% of the wickets taken at Cardiff this year have been from spinners.

Australia aren’t playing Wales.

There are already three blokes in the team that bowl better spin than him.

Shane Watson could take up spin bowling.

Ricky Ponting may not bowl him anyway.

Australia has a proud history of spin.

Ben Hilfenhaus is like way cooler.

Matthew 24:3-31 As Jesus was sitting on the Mount of Olives, the disciples came to him privately. “Tell us,” they said, “when will this happen, and what will be the sign of your coming and of the end of the age?” Jesus answered: “Watch out that no one deceives you. Or many will come in my name, claiming, ‘I am the Christ,’ and will deceive many. You will hear of wars and rumours of wars, but see to it that you are not alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places and a former Queensland club spinner from NSWales shall bowl in an ashes test outside of Australia and England.”

Bryce McGain will be sad.