Shahid Afridi has been drug tested

December 21, 2021

Since no one at the ICC or world anti-doping agencies could believe Afridi’s two grown up batting displays, they have decided to test him for drugs.

This is a standard practice, and not because they saw him snorting cocaine of a group of women after his innings in the semi final.

They are looking for a performance-enhancing cocktail that will explain the last few days.

We don’t need a test to tell us what substance is in his veins.

Awesomeness. Pure Awesomeness.

A natural compound found in the Zulus, Indigenous Australians, Jazz musicians and Natalie Portman.

Afridi has bucketloads of awesomeness coursing though him.

Awesomeness is not an illegal performance-enhancing substance, as there is no known test for it, although it does make the person perform better and makes them more awesome.

Along with all this awesomeness, his tests will show more testosterone than any drug test has ever shown, but this is not artificial. Afridi is a bulging sinew of raw sexual power, and he runs on testosterone.

Any readings of above normal testosterone levels should be accepted.

Ofcourse there is one drug that Afridi will have.

There is a fair chance he did not take it knowingly, and that Younis Khan crushed it, and then slipped it into Afridi’s meals.

Adderall.

Which for those unaware does this:
Adderall is a central nervous system stimulant. It affects chemicals in the brain and nerves that contribute to hyperactivity and impulse control.

I think we all know the tests will show up positive for this.