I’m sure I should be doing some preview of the IPL.
Checking out the teams.
Comparing batting strengths.
Writing quips and which players are ass wanks.
But it’s the IPL, and I can’t be assed.
The IPL doesn’t need analysis, it needs drunken whimsy, sardonic wit, idiotic rants and Lalit Modi jokes.
Any sort of real analysis is wrong, and should be stopped.
You don’t critique a porn film.
You just watch, and masturbate.
And the IPL is the same kind of animal.
So stop worrying about who is playing for who.
Forget about which pitches will suit which attack.
Just put your hand inside your pants/skirsts/moomoos, and enjoy the spectacle, until you get bored, or ‘finish up’.