equatorThere is a reason Ian Botham is cooler and better than virtually every England cricketer of all time.
He is not English.
Years ago when Ray Illingworth was trekking through Germany when he stumbled upon a cave.
Being the intrepid man he is, he decided to go deep into the cave to see what he could find; he found a man trapped in Ice.
Ray immediately called in the English and Wales Cricket Board taskforce to defrost this ‘specimen’ and take him back to Lord’s.
They shaved him, cut his hair into a fashionable style, and taught him the very basics of the language. He took to cricket extremely fast, and before long he had become the best player in his team.
Early on there was some problems with Ian hitting women on the hea with rocks and taking them back to his hotel room, but by the time he was in his 30s he didn’t so that much.
Now the EWCB look for cricketers in all sorts of strange places, they found James Anderson in a beauty salon.
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Hmmm… I always thought some aliens had accidentally left him behind when they were having a picnic.
I’ve always imagined aliens to bat more elegently, botham couldn’t have been on. Pietersen might be one though, he lives on his own planet most of the time and his constant need of attention might be down to having none of his own kind on this planet.
I assume James Anderson was getting his nails done by A. Cook