equatorAccording to this reliable source, the US Government is going to meet the aliens who are planning to reveal themsleves by landing in daylight at a well populated spot.
DARPA is the organisation in charge and they are going to send over a meet and greet of Earth’s finest people.
On the list so far are:
Steven Spielberg, Angelina Jolie, Madonna, Sir Paul McCartney, Barbra Streisand, Kylie Minogue, Stevie Wonder, Bob Dylan, Michael Jackson (because he is still alive), Tom Cruise and Stephen Hawkins.
Thisis a party I’d like to skip.
So we need to liven this shit up a bit, so I think we should send a playing XI over.
Now this is an important event, so these players have been picked carefully.
Sehwag: It is important that the God of Sehwagology meet the Alien Gods, to check the effect having Gods of various beliefs in the room at one time, and because his baldness will make them feel at home.
P Hughes: Aliens have clearly inspired his technique, so it would be nice if he could thank them personally.
K Sangakkara: The aliens will want to know what cool looks like.
J Ryder: What if they end up landing in some boring shit hole, you need someone to liven it up for them.
AB DeVilliers: He can serenade them with pseudo Christian songs.
S Afridi: No trip to earth is complete without meeting him.
DJ Sammy: They will fall in love with him on sight, they will have never seen a cranium so closely proportioned to their own.
P Jayawardene: It would be nice to show them the one keeper in world cricket that can catch.
G Swann: He can talk to them about his home planet of mars.
P Siddle: Everyone likes him, and so will the aliens, he can give them hugs with that ginormous man chest of his.
I Sharma: Since our medicine is still rudimentary, he can get the Alien medics to look at that throat lump of his.
Players who can’t go, as they will start an inter-planetary war:
H Singh, A Symonds, A Nel, J Anderson, J Kallis, M Hayden, R Ponting, A Redmond, S Broad.
Also Lalit Modi shouldn’t be given access to them, I can’t see how that could help anyone.
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and natalie portman/.?
Presumably Madonna signed up in the hope of
abductingadopting an alien orphan?If the aliens – as aliens always do – turn nasty, we can repel them with this startling image, kindly posted by a Saffer friend: http://tinyurl.com/sex-on-legs
S Macgill is already an alien, or at least, comes from another planet.
I should have known better than to click on that Ceci, so why did I do it anyway?
wouldn’t aliens be more intersted in middle finger of mendis than that of swann
Perhaps you can make Ganguly the manager? It is only fitting.
Sachintha’s last blog post..Weekend Fun
Ceci, there REALLY was no need for that now was there? Like Dave, I shoulda known better!!!
it is unfair to not to mention Sreesanth’s name in the list of “Players who can’t go” Sreesanth will not only start an interplanetary war but will also “cry” or do a “break dance” in the memory of MJ and will scare off all the aliens.
John Buchanan should also be kept away since he may plug in his laptop and make a presentation on how he can help the aliens with “robotic” techniques developed by himself.