cricket with balls

1o runs off 5 balls.

India had dug their own grave.

England destroyer Jerome Taylor coming in.

Dhoni hits him for six, and almost yawns.

Then he waddles a 2, takes a single, and has a nap at the non strikers as Yusuf wins the game.

It should have been an exciting match, but with dhoni there it seemed like a sunday stroll to get an ice cream.

This is such a stupid fucking series though.

It took Dhoni’s waddle to victory to get me to speak about it.

Australia has looked narcoleptic at times during this match.

But some cool shit has happened to the players who are awake.

Michael Hussey came back from the wilderness.

Brett Lee proved earnestness can produce wickets.

And now Marcus North, their major form worry, has made a calm hundred.

Sure Phillip Hughes can’t play short or full balls. And Nathan Hauritz would be more use cutting the oranges or holding the bags. But having three players find form in one match is pretty handy.

North’s innings wasn’t orgasmic, but he never really looked like going out, and when he is at his best that is generally how North bats.

He is what commentators like to call an organised batsmen, he files runs and plans his innings.

There is nothing wrong with it; Australia still has Ponting, Hughes, Clarke, Haddin and Johnson to produce the crowd-pleasing match-stealing performances.

North just needs to keep meeting his deadlines and hoping the boss’s son (Watson) doesn’t get his job.

If Harmy (and Pepsi Sandri) has worked Phil Hughes out, why do I have an over whelming feeling to back him for most runs in the series?

Australia has no spinners in England, one is at home with his kid, another is not taking cocaine, and then Nathan Hauritz.

This is a terrible situation, but Andrew Hilditch and I have been working on a plan.

The raelians are experimenting in cloning, so Andrew and I flew over to nevada, and gave them the coccyx of Tiger Bill O’Reilly.

Being that this is still an experiment, there have been problems.

The First Tiger Bill clone could only bowl long hops with a ridiculous slingy side on action, the second one bowled shit, but did spend hours explaining why he should be picked, and the third bowled ok but stole Andrew’s wallet.

At this stage we are expecting them to have perfected Tiger Bill in time for the 2nd test.

Want to listen to Jason “Dizzy” Gillespie and Cricket With Balls Code of Conduct XI member Lawrie Colliver talk about the Ashes, what a stupid question, ofcourse you do.

On the 16th of July (Day 1 at Lord’s) at the Temple Place Walkabout from 7pm you can.

It is 10 quid to get in, and drink specials all night.

Hopefully by drink specials they don’t mean snake bites.

There is a chance I will be down there, and it takes something special like this to get me inot the walkabout.

New whisky blog the master blender has been given free tickets to the Rajasthan V Middlesex T20 match at Lord’s on the 6th of July.

If you want them, go here and ask for them.

Unfortunately I have no free whisky to offer their readers.